Why forced marriages?

What does Islam say about forced marriages?

Because…

– from the Qur’an and the Prophet’s explanations

A marriage is a contract between a man and a woman. If either one of the two are forced into the contract – then the contract is invalid.

Women must give their consent to marriage

Abu Hurayra [r] narrated that the messenger of Allah (s) said:

‘A matron should not be given in marriage except after consulting her, and a virgin should not be given in marriage except after her permission is sought.’ (Bukhari)

This is also clear from an incident in the life of the Prophet (s).

Buraydah narrates that once a woman came to the Prophet [s] and said: “O Messenger of Allah, my father married me to my cousin in order to raise his social standing, but I do not want to be married to him.”

The Prophet [s] gave her the option of annulment. At this point, she said: “I have already reconciled myself to my father’s decision, but I wanted it to be known that women have a say in the matter.” (Ahmad)

The goal of marriage

The goal of marriage is love and tranquillity. Marriage is Islam is not about one person dominating and abusing the other.

Look at how Allah (s) describes marriage in the Qur’an.

“And among His Signs is that
He created spouses for you of your own kind
So that you might find tranquillity in them.
And he has placed affection and compassion between you.There are certainly signs in that for people who reflect.” (30:21)

This is why Ibn Abbas said: “Indeed I spruce myself up for my wife and she adorns herself for me, and I love that I should redeem all my rights I have over my wife, so that she should redeem all the rights she has over me, because Allah said: ‘… women possess rights similar to those held over them, to be honoured with fairness…’(2:228) ”. (Ibn Abi Shaybah/Musannaf)

Because…

– from a rational point of view

A marriage is a contract between a man and a woman. If either of the two are forced into the contract without agreement – then the contract is invalid.

Muslims with their own culture

Islam is a way of life, and it is the faith of over a billion people.

It so happens that these billion people also have their own cultures. So Muslims of Pakistan have a different culture to the Muslims of Morocco.

No doubt, sometimes Muslims force women into marriage because that is an element of their culture.

More Islam not less

The way that will help resolve these forced marriages is to revive the rights given to women in Islam, rather than throwing the baby out with the bath water and ask people to leave the faith as well as the culture.

Arranged not forced

Arranged marriages are marriages which involve the wider family and friends acting as go-betweens and helping organise things. The final decision is made by the couple themselves.

A forced marriage is a marriage without the consent of either or both people involved.

Islam accepts the first, and rejects outright the second.

The goal of marriage

The goal of marriage is love and tranquillity. Marriage is Islam is not about one person dominating and abusing the other.

Look at how Allah (s) describes marriage in the Qur’an.

“And among His Signs is that
He created spouses for you of your own kind
So that you might find tranquillity in them.
And he has placed affection and compassion between you.There are certainly signs in that for people who reflect.” (30:21)

This is why Ibn Abbas, a companion of the Prophet (s), said: “Indeed I spruce myself up for my wife and she adorns herself for me, and I love that I should redeem all my rights I have over my wife, so that she should redeem all the rights she has over me, because Allah said: ‘… women possess rights similar to those held over them, to be honoured with fairness…’(2:228) ”. (Ibn Abi Shaybah/Musannaf)